It’s that magical time of year again…Valentine’s Day.
Firstly, I really want to make it clear that I am a self-proclaimed hopeless romantic. I believe in love, I believe in a perfect person for you, I believe in spending the rest of your dying days as someone’s companion and life partner. I really do. If I didn’t I wouldn’t be in this industry, I would not be a wedding coordinator bringing you wedding trends, and sound advice for couples! Secondly, I want to make it beyond crystal clear that it is not because I find myself single this year – you can ask the guy I was dating last Valentine’s Day! I just really don’t care about it, I’m not a fan of expressing love on this particular day. I believe in love all year round.
I feel our society has put such an emphasis on this one particular day to showcase your love for your partner. It baffles me! Aren’t we suppose to do that everyday? Aren’t we suppose to sneak that kiss in when they least expect it? If you like cooking for your partner, couldn’t you make them that extra special dish on a random Monday night because they had a bad day? Aren’t we ladies, suppose to want to wear lingerie for him if we’re feeling particularly naughty! Aren’t we suppose to send that random text message that promises “sexy time” when he/she gets home? What I am trying to convey is the fact that you don’t need to focus on Valentine’s Day as this fabulous day of love, we should be expressing it everyday!
My news feed be it on Twitter, Facebook or Instagram is blown up with images of bouquets of roses, chocolates, and stuffed toys only on this particular day. I really have to wonder about all the other days of the year? By displaying these images solely on Valentine’s Day, you become like everyone else that expects it. You become a part of the masses. I know, it seems harsh but just stop and think about it. Being truly in love means you are each others Valentine’s 365 days of the year not just on February 14th. So why aren’t we so excited to wear red and pink and eat cheap chocolates at a jam-packed restaurant any other day of the year?
We have allowed the hype and craziness of Valentine’s Day to be excepted and normal within our relationships. We become disappointed if our men don’t buy us the right gift, or the wrong size at La Senza (NB. men it is 2013, shop online and get out of the lingerie stores. I can’t stand men in the lingerie shop! Your creepy eyes as I’m trying to buy a comfort bra are just creepy!!). When the truth is you know he loves you, you know he’s special. Then why beat him up with lippy attitude all day long when he isn’t into Valentine’s Day?
Recently, I was with a few of my closest girlfriends and the topic of Valentine’s Day came up. There were a few that were for it and those that weren’t into Valentine’s Day. It got me thinking about why I dislike Valentine’s Day so much. I realized it’s because we have lost the meaning of love and we have lost the importance of small gestures throughout the year. When I originally sat down to write this I had written a long list of items I really dislike about Valentine’s Day. For example, I don’t like cheap chocolates, and quite frankly I don’t even like Godiva! I am more the Bounty Bar from the gas station kind of gal – or a spoonful of Nutella. On special occasions such as Valentine’s Day, I like Baci Perugina…ok, back to my point. Another thing on the list was red roses. I love roses, just particularly am not a fan of red ones. Fairly sure I got this from my mother. My parents have been married for 32 years and I can safely assume they have spent about 34 Valentine’s Days together. My father still shows up every year with red roses for my mother and although she totally dislikes red roses, she still thanks him! She loves that he tries, and she has said to me many times it isn’t about the roses. She knows he loves her. He puts gas in her car almost every week, he likes to ensure her windshield washer fluid is full and that the garbage is always taken out on the right days…and thats the way my dad expresses his love for my mom all year round! He messes it up every Valentine’s Day, but he tries with his small gestures to get it right the rest of the year.
I guess you can call me old-fashioned, but we should appreciate the small gestures of love from our partners and I think by keeping them to ourselves they became more meaningful. We should have “high” expectations all year round and actually take the day off on Valentine’s Day. It really isn’t special if the rest of the year isn’t. We don’t need stuffed toys, chocolates, and roses to say I love you, granted they are nice to receive. I don’t want you to think that I don’t like receiving them, but as I have matured I just realize the importance of keeping it to myself, my partner and really enjoying the gifts, and the day with that person.
Here’s an idea for the men: go into Hallmark on February 15 and buy a bunch of marked down Valentine’s Day cards. Tuck them away for a random day. Now, ca’mon ladies! How sweet would it be if your man gave you a Valentine’s Day card in the middle of May because you were having a bad day? Accompanied by your favourite chocolate bar, instead of those cheap Valentine’s Day boxed chocolates! I know men don’t think like this, but maybe by reading this blog they will get the idea (wink, wink send this to them and I will be expecting thank you notes in June!)
With a lot of love in my heart I wish each of you a Happy Valentine’s Day and I hope that however you choose to spend your day, you are happy!